


Christmas survival tactics

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-26
Updated: 2011-12-26
Packaged: 2017-11-22 12:59:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/610086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>or: OD are a den band, and there are Christmas presents</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas survival tactics

**Author's Note:**

> It was easier to roll downhill.  
> That way I didn't sink.  
> \- Craig Raine

\- - - - -  
  
  
Liam, in the way Liam usually dealt with things, had managed to acquire all his Christmas presents by the end of November and, as a direct result, spent most of his December watching amusedly as people around him struggled to meet the deadline.   
  
Harry was the worst, always leaving everything to the last minute which meant on the 23rd, he was begging the amazon.com gods to deliver his order on time while hastening through a dozen shops because he couldn't find anything his mum would like. Really, why hadn't he started earlier, for example in November, like some other fabulous people he knew?  
  
Harry dragged Niall along, because Niall was magic at finding the perfect gift for every occasion, and Zayn had to babysit his little sisters while his parents scrambled to a last-minute hurry as well. This meant that, just as every year, band practice fell flat on the evening before Christmas eve, despite the fact that Liam scheduled it for the same day every single year, and everyone should have _realized_ by now to keep that day wide open.  
  
"They should really be used to it at this point," he told Louis over the Skype vidcam, ready to start -  
  
But Louis cut him off, saying "Ugh, can we skip the bitching this year?" before he settled comfortably into his couch. "I think I can actually recount the whole tirade back at you at this point, and let me disillusion you, it doesn't get any more interesting with time."  
  
Liam gave him the bitchface.  
  
Louis threw his head back and laughed, amused. "That never works on me."  
  
"I know," Liam said, sighing. "It only pisses me off more." Then he scrubbed his hand through his hair and gave in. "Fine. Hey, why are you not having panic attacks this year?" Louis tended to be just like Harry usually - two years ago, he'd made it into the record books, skipping out thirty minutes before Christmas dinner with his family to meet Niall around the corner to do a swap, gifts for money.   
  
Louis smiled mysteriously. "Who says I'm not?"  
  
"You're on Skype," Liam pointed out and looked at his watch. "It's six pm. Shops are still open for a couple hours."  
  
"Hey," Louis said, not listening at all, and heaved his guitar from somewhere off the floor. "I wrote a song, wanna hear?"  
  
"No?" Liam said, squinting.  
  
Louis made a face, and played it for him anyway. It was about as bad as Liam had expected.  
  
"That was terrible," he said honestly, not pulling his punches. He'd learned early on that there was no point coddling Louis. Louis actually believed he was that awesome if you told him he was, and then he went around showing everyone. Liam wasn't surprised he had no shame left at this point.   
  
Louis sighed, not discouraged in the slightest. "Worth a try."  
  
"Not when it pierces my eardrums, it's not." But it was said with a teasing smile, and Louis took it as such.   
  
"Actually, the only present I'm not sure I've got is yours," Louis then admitted, putting the guitar aside.   
  
Liam blinked. "You didn't get me anything?" He hadn't expected that to sting as much, but it did. He was floored by the realization; up to this point, Louis had always made a strong point of telling him he was the easiest to buy gifts for and therefore, his _favorite_.  
  
Louis was shaking his head, though. "I've got something for you," he said. "Don't make the sadface. You know I can't stand the angst, Liam."  
  
Liam stuck out his tongue.  
  
"Oh, _mature_. Just watch, soon you'll be as grown-up as I am!" Louis smirked.  
  
"Fuck off."  
  
"You fuck off."  
  
"Mummy, Louis' using the f-word," a squeaky girl-voice came from somewhere outside of Liam's range of vision through Louis' camera - a sister.  
  
Louis made a guilty face. "Whoops, didn't see her there."  
  
Liam cracked up. Louis started laughing too, and then he had to log off and go placate the family.   
  
"I'll drop by your place tomorrow afternoon," he said in good-bye.  
  
Liam smiled and waved like a complete tool (but didn't feel too bad about being embarrassing because nothing he ever did could be worse than Louis. True fact.)  
  
  
\- - - - -  
  
  
The boys all dropped by Liam's place the following afternoon, because firstly, Liam's place had the biggest (and sound-proofed) den, which meant they could practice there without getting kicked out (or make a lot of other, inappropriate noise). And secondly, Liam's dad made the best gingerbread men in the universe, so picking them up had almost become a tradition at this point ever since they'd joined in holy bandness.  
  
Well, there had been that one time, two years ago, when Harry's parents had been out of the house and they'd gone to Harry's, but no one talked about that.   
  
Niall arrived first, dropping his parcels to Liam's, and they played video games until Harry and Louis got there, together.   
  
It hadn't used to bother Liam much, their constant together-ness. It had been cute, the touching and fake-kissing and grabbing each other all the time, showing up as a double-act everywhere; until Liam had developed an inexplicable and utterly pathetic crush on Louis and then it had just been annoying and embarrassing. And really, Louis was the oldest and Harry was the youngest member of their band, they practically had a generational gap to conquer. Liam would have been the much smarter best-friend choice (so there).  
  
So now whenever Harry and Louis were sitting on each other or cuddling or _lying on the floor on top of each other_ , making sounds like they were - oh god, what was _going on_ with them, Liam just pretended he had very important things to do and went to get a glass of water or tell his mom that they were all fine, nothing to worry about, and no, her carpet wouldn't be stained to the point of irreparable damage, no Sir.  
  
This time, the door bell saved him and he was very glad to see Zayn, dressed up in a funky Santa hat.   
  
Zayn hadn't used to touch Liam all the time, but then sometime shortly after Liam had developed above-mentioned pathetic crush, Zayn had started to cling to Liam all the time, hugging and putting his head in Liam's lap. It had been worrying (he didn't want to lead Zayn on or anything), but Zayn had a girlfriend he was very in love with now, so. Apparently, the touching had some other nefarious purpose?  
  
Liam was almost afraid to ask.  
  
In any case, Zayn hugged Liam for almost three whole minutes before letting go of him and bouncing to the den. Liam joined him there a few moments later, sat down next to Niall and said, "Niall, I think you and I, we are the two only sane people in this band."  
  
Niall hid a smile behind his hand and said, "You don't say." And then he said, "I got you Moleskine for Christmas, and an Inception DVD," and Liam said, "Oh my god, you _are_ one of Santa's elves, aren't you, how are you even real?" and (after a bit of awkward _can-I-is-this-okay?_ ) gave him the biggest cuddle ever.  
  
He did notice Louis had stopped humping Harry to stare at Niall unblinkingly until Niall let go, but he figured Louis had something in his eye, maybe. He wasn't quite sure what to make of it.   
  
"So I'm just going to, like, chuck your presents into your bags now," Liam announced finally when a bit of silence set in. Everyone watched him march over to the pile and check the names on the tags and make the piles.  
  
It had been a good idea, whoever had come up with it (okay, Liam had come up with it, whatever, he was a smartass). This way, no one knew which gift was from whom - except Liam, of course, who always knew who'd gotten him which gift - and he also always knew no one _ever_ figured out which gifts _he_ 'd gotten for them.   
  
It was only until he got to his own pile that he realized there were only three parcels left. He tried hard not to let it show on his face, and the other boys had to realize too, because there was an embarrassed bit of fumbling before they said, one after another, "I should go home now," and "Mum, you know, waiting", and "Look at the time!" from Niall, the dumbass, _so subtle_.  
  
"Wow, I've never cleaned a room out of people that fast," Liam said into the sudden emptiness. "Including that one time, my thirteenth birthday party -"  
  
"Liam," Louis said, rolling his eyes.   
  
"No, I swear, that was a horrible birthday, traumatic even, I didn't want any birthday party again after that, my mum had to force me -"  
  
"Liam." Louis stepped closer and put his hand over Liam's mouth.  
  
Liam blinked. Then he licked Louis' palm.  
  
It never worked on Louis, who didn't even jump, just gave Liam a look that read disappointment for being terribly unimaginative in the face of light assault.  
  
"This - is somewhat counterproductive," Louis then said, staring at his own hand. Which was over Liam's mouth. Oh. _Oh._ "This is really lame, okay, I try not being so lame, I have some _great_ one-liners, and also, I wanted to sing you a song. But the boys said it would be okay to just. Go ahead. Because apparently, you're stupidly in love with me."  
  
Liam flushed bright red. He didn't shake his head though. Louis' hand was very warm over his mouth. He suddenly wanted to lick it again, very much, but in a completely different way.   
  
Louis was red in the face as well. It was new, and sort of exciting, to see Louis this flustered.   
  
"I should probably add that I had no idea about that part - if it were true. Until recently. I would have done this a lot sooner."  
  
Liam made a sound in the back of his throat.   
  
"Right. Sorry. You could have said something too, though!"  
  
Liam narrowed his eyes. Louis opened his mouth (possibly to ramble on _even longer_ ), but Liam had had enough at this point: he raised his hand, grasped Louis' wrist and forced his hand off his mouth. Then he was leaning into Louis' chest, pressing their lips together in their very first kiss ( _ohgod_ ).   
  
Louis' lips were dry and a little rough, and Liam's very wet and hot from Louis' palm, but it was all right, it was fine, it was _awesome_ really; especially when Louis started kissing back and then it was a smooth slide of lips on lips. Liam opened his mouth to let Louis' tongue in, shuddered when Louis' fingers buried in the nape of his neck, bodies pressed together at their hips and chests.   
  
Louis didn't stop until they were both out of breath, kissing and kissing and kissing him _forever_. And then, when they could not longer stand it, he licked and bit a slow path to Liam's ear and neck, hands wandering below Liam's shirt.  
  
It was a bit too much, too soon, so Liam pushed at his shoulder. Louis paused then. There was a completely stupid, infuriating, _I am the hottest piece of ass in the world and you know it_ grin on his face. And Liam didn't care a single bit because he sort of was.  
  
"That," he tried, caught another breath and tried again. "That was. Good."  
  
Louis' smile widened. "Right?"  
  
"Shut up." Liam hit his shoulder. "Whatever, where's my Christmas present, bitch?"  
  
Louis's smile turned dirty around the corners. He tugged at Liam's belt loops, thumb travelling below the waistband and said, "Right here, whenever you're ready to collect." And then he kissed Liam more, and Liam couldn't exactly protest, because even though Louis was as terrible at one-liners as ever, he was really, really _really_ good at the making out part of the deal.  
  
  
\- - - - -


End file.
